What do you think is one of the largest causes of stress today? I think it's money. How many times have we heard the statistics about money and divorce? We worry that we don't have enough. We worry that we're going to lose our jobs and lose our homes and be destitute. And in today's economy that really doesn't seem like we're overreacting.
Money for me is a constant source of frustration. I have a bad case of bad luck. A year and a half ago, I started doing Dave Ramsey's program. I had money in the bank and I had started a debt snowball. I paid off my car a year early. Then I bought a house. I don't regret buying a house at all. I love my home and I could not have gotten a better deal. However, that was when the bad luck hit. My offer was accepted on the house. Then my cat got hit by a car and I sunk about $3000 into fixing her. (I know that sounds crazy but she is worth every penny. We've been through a lot together and she is MY responsibility.) Then I sunk $1700 into my car. As soon as I moved in, I sunk another $600 into my car. I had just started to get back into financial shape last spring when I discovered I needed a new roof. When that was done, I was in a car accident and had to, you guessed it, fix my car. But it's not just the big things. It is my near consistent inability to stick to my budget every week.
This month, I am going to focus on getting my finances back together. I've read another Ramsey book and am feeling inspired. My taxes are filed and I'm just waiting for my refund, which will give me a jump start.
This month I will:
1. Focus on living within my budget by being frugal and cutting back on some of the things I think I need. Such as fancy meals out. Also, find some small ways to save money. Clip some coupons and finally put that extra weather stripping around the front door.
2. Get started on Ramsey's plan. Finish out my started emergency fund (Half way there!) and start a debt snowball.
3. Enjoy and appreciate what I have. Remember, focusing on what you don't have is a great way to forget about all of the wonderful things you do have. By taking time to enjoy the wonderful things in your life, your cats or your car, your home and your love, you realize the wealth you've already acquired. I am so lucky but it's easy to forget that.
P.S. A note on Health: I am closing out my January on the couch with a cold, feeling frustrated that I can't work out.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Sunday, January 29, 2012
January: Has it helped?
January is a hard month for me. Every year I start to droop a little. It must be the darkness and cold that keeps me in a state of constant worry. Last year, I was beginning to worry that my man didn't care for me. We had only been together two months, were still in the new relationship high, but I needed SOMETHING to worry about. This year I've worried about him and about money and about the house and about my friends and that maybe I'm a bad person and about death and about my car. Worry, worry, worry. I have literally worried myself to tears.
That being said, this month wasn't about worry or dealing with that. This month was about my health. I have changed my diet and made more of an effort to work out and I have tracked my progress on Sparkpeople. So, I think it may be time to reflect.
For a very very long time I have eaten a bowl of Doritos nearly every night. I love Doritos. If you get me to a party and hand me a back of Cool Ranch, there is a god chance that you will never get it back. I don't do that anymore. I realized at the end of December that it was something I had quit doing on my own. So, I quit buying Doritos, except for the new flavors which you can't blame me for trying. The amazing thing is that I don't miss them. Not really. Not at all. I can't even really remember how they taste. I bet if I caught the smell of them it would be different. I was surprised to see what I was giving up for those little triangular delights.
I used to eat cereal for breakfast, soup for lunch, and a microwaveable meal for dinner. That usually put me at 700 calories before Doritos. When I got home, I was famished and ate my bowl of delight but also stood in the kitchen shoving anything that looked good in my mouth, including more Doritos. Now, I have a calorie budget of 350 for breakfast, 500 for lunch, 500 for dinner, and two 100 calorie snacks. I never use all of my breakfast calories, even though I've started buying Kashi cereal which is higher in calories but also in protein and fiber and lots of good stuff. I eat it with almond or soy milk, a successful experiment. I am lucky enough to be able to eat at home three days a week for lunch and I can make myself all kinds of stuff. When I come home from work, I make a dinner and eat it. Sometimes it may just be a microwaveable thing. Other times it's stir fry or a veggie burger or an actual meal.
I am amazed at the amount of food I can eat and sometimes have a hard time getting ENOUGH calories!
Also, I've been doing my best to do aerobics five days a week and toning three. Sometimes, things happen that prevent me from doing it but I have never cut out more than ONE of these work outs in a week. My aerobics are actually getting a little too easy for me. I remind myself every morning that I will feel better if I work out than if I don't and that's true.
I try to keep my energy up throughout the day. That's a hard one for me. I make work as active as I can in an attempt to keep myself going. The problem is that I work fast. When I try to stay active I work faster and end up running out of things to do.
I do feel BETTER and I bet that I would even feel happier if it weren't for winter. I do struggle and I feel proud of myself when I overcome. I feel good when I see that I've lost weight. I'm down 3 lbs for the year. It isn't much but I know that slow and steady is the way to go.
That being said, this month wasn't about worry or dealing with that. This month was about my health. I have changed my diet and made more of an effort to work out and I have tracked my progress on Sparkpeople. So, I think it may be time to reflect.
For a very very long time I have eaten a bowl of Doritos nearly every night. I love Doritos. If you get me to a party and hand me a back of Cool Ranch, there is a god chance that you will never get it back. I don't do that anymore. I realized at the end of December that it was something I had quit doing on my own. So, I quit buying Doritos, except for the new flavors which you can't blame me for trying. The amazing thing is that I don't miss them. Not really. Not at all. I can't even really remember how they taste. I bet if I caught the smell of them it would be different. I was surprised to see what I was giving up for those little triangular delights.
I used to eat cereal for breakfast, soup for lunch, and a microwaveable meal for dinner. That usually put me at 700 calories before Doritos. When I got home, I was famished and ate my bowl of delight but also stood in the kitchen shoving anything that looked good in my mouth, including more Doritos. Now, I have a calorie budget of 350 for breakfast, 500 for lunch, 500 for dinner, and two 100 calorie snacks. I never use all of my breakfast calories, even though I've started buying Kashi cereal which is higher in calories but also in protein and fiber and lots of good stuff. I eat it with almond or soy milk, a successful experiment. I am lucky enough to be able to eat at home three days a week for lunch and I can make myself all kinds of stuff. When I come home from work, I make a dinner and eat it. Sometimes it may just be a microwaveable thing. Other times it's stir fry or a veggie burger or an actual meal.
I am amazed at the amount of food I can eat and sometimes have a hard time getting ENOUGH calories!
Also, I've been doing my best to do aerobics five days a week and toning three. Sometimes, things happen that prevent me from doing it but I have never cut out more than ONE of these work outs in a week. My aerobics are actually getting a little too easy for me. I remind myself every morning that I will feel better if I work out than if I don't and that's true.
I try to keep my energy up throughout the day. That's a hard one for me. I make work as active as I can in an attempt to keep myself going. The problem is that I work fast. When I try to stay active I work faster and end up running out of things to do.
I do feel BETTER and I bet that I would even feel happier if it weren't for winter. I do struggle and I feel proud of myself when I overcome. I feel good when I see that I've lost weight. I'm down 3 lbs for the year. It isn't much but I know that slow and steady is the way to go.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
January 1: Out There vs In Here
Something surprising came up today.
I was trucking along quite nicely. I weighed and measured myself. I set up my Spark People account. I stuck pretty much within my calorie range, only cheating with a salad at dinner. I took a nap and lounged around the house. I listed out my bills for the months and my total debts owed. I did my weekly stuff: Reading a chapter in my organization book. I did my daily stuff: journaled, read the Bible, read my book. I may not have been happy but I was starting to feel like I was back in the game. I didn't necessarily feel unhappy either. I AM happy. Happy to hang out with Matt and the cats and play the Sims and take naps.
But there's been something nagging at me lately. The problem is that I can pin point what it is but that doesn't mean that I can do much about it.
I am lonely and I hate people. At this point in my life I am down to a few good friends. They may be few but they really are GOOD. My bestie moved to Connecticut last year and it's been rough. My other friends are so busy and so am I. A year and a half ago, Bestie lived two miles away and I could go there whenever I needed some social interaction.
That covers lonely.
Now, the reason I am down so many friends is that lots of people suck. They are liars and backstabbers and drama queens and quick to call you all of these things even though you know you aren't. They are two-faced and quick to drop you when someone else comes along who is more useful to them. And I hate it. I feel so slighted by my old friends sometimes. It doesn't matter if I don't see them or talk to them. I see them on Facebook and I hear about them through the grape vine and I get all tangled and knotty inside because I am HURT.
If I said it before, I've said it a thousand times. My happiness depends on me. It's about me taking responsibility for my life and living with no regrets. Happiness is about the IN HERE, not the OUT THERE. If I rely on the out there to be happy, I will be constantly crushed by other people and the news and the weather. I can't change those things. I can only change myself, how I think about and react to those things.
So, this year I am giving myself permission to be selfish. It has to be about me or it won't really make a difference at all.
I was trucking along quite nicely. I weighed and measured myself. I set up my Spark People account. I stuck pretty much within my calorie range, only cheating with a salad at dinner. I took a nap and lounged around the house. I listed out my bills for the months and my total debts owed. I did my weekly stuff: Reading a chapter in my organization book. I did my daily stuff: journaled, read the Bible, read my book. I may not have been happy but I was starting to feel like I was back in the game. I didn't necessarily feel unhappy either. I AM happy. Happy to hang out with Matt and the cats and play the Sims and take naps.
But there's been something nagging at me lately. The problem is that I can pin point what it is but that doesn't mean that I can do much about it.
I am lonely and I hate people. At this point in my life I am down to a few good friends. They may be few but they really are GOOD. My bestie moved to Connecticut last year and it's been rough. My other friends are so busy and so am I. A year and a half ago, Bestie lived two miles away and I could go there whenever I needed some social interaction.
That covers lonely.
Now, the reason I am down so many friends is that lots of people suck. They are liars and backstabbers and drama queens and quick to call you all of these things even though you know you aren't. They are two-faced and quick to drop you when someone else comes along who is more useful to them. And I hate it. I feel so slighted by my old friends sometimes. It doesn't matter if I don't see them or talk to them. I see them on Facebook and I hear about them through the grape vine and I get all tangled and knotty inside because I am HURT.
If I said it before, I've said it a thousand times. My happiness depends on me. It's about me taking responsibility for my life and living with no regrets. Happiness is about the IN HERE, not the OUT THERE. If I rely on the out there to be happy, I will be constantly crushed by other people and the news and the weather. I can't change those things. I can only change myself, how I think about and react to those things.
So, this year I am giving myself permission to be selfish. It has to be about me or it won't really make a difference at all.
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